A new enemy

A while back, Kris at Dummocrats suggested that we need a new enemy:

The problem is that our enemies aren't any good at sports. When Americans and Russians faced off in the Olympics, it was also a good matchup between Communism and Capitalism. For all of communism's many, many flaws, those Commies could sure build a great sports system. Or, alternatively, they gave their "women" some really powerful drugs.

Islamofascists, on the other hand, don't have much of a presence at the Games. To be fair, Islamofascists don't actually rule very many countries and in general, Islamofascists live in warmer climates. But aren't those just excuses? Maybe if Islamofascists want to prove to the rest of the world that their way of life is superior to ours, they should try to do it on the snow or ice or track.

Well, I've hit upon the perfect solution: let's make the Winter Games themselves the enemy! Think about it: clearly, winter doesn't like us very mcuh - witness the blistering assault it launched yesterday. And Americans don't seem to like games very much in general - we're getting fatter and fatter every day. So why not combine these two natural enemies, and focus our rage on the (incredibly boring anyway) Winter Games?

|